If you don’t really know someone, how can you truly love him/her? Do you know his/her answers to the following questions? Perhaps take them to prayer. Perhaps ask him/her—even if you think you know his/her answers. Jesus frequently asks his disciples questions when he already knows their answers. This must mean that there’s something good for us about being asked, having to think through our own answers, and seeing someone else’s reaction to our answers.

Do You See Them?

  • What is good and admirable about them?
  • What are their natural strengths?
  • What are their supernatural gifts?
  • What are some of their quirks or habits that are uniquely theirs?
  • What is a memory you have with them that makes you smile?
  • When was the last time you just hung out with them?
  • How do you think Jesus looks at them?

What’s Important to Them?

  • Name one of their favorite novels/movies. What do they love about it?
  • What would they consider their ideal job? Why?
  • What are some of the important events coming up in their life? How do they feel about them?
  • What are some of their favorite ways to spend time?
  • Who are their closest friends?

What Troubles Them?

  • What’s stressing them out right now?
  • What is their greatest fear?
  • Who is someone they struggle to love?
  • Who has hurt this person?
  • What medical problems do they worry about?

What Are Their Hopes and Dreams?

  • What do they desire?
  • What are some of their dreams for their life?
  • What do they need?
  • What do they wish they had?
  • If they won the lottery, what would they do with the money?

Where Are They in Relationship with Jesus?

  • What’s their friendship with Jesus like? What does Jesus mean to them?
  • If they could ask God anything right now, what would it be?
  • What are they curious about/struggling with in relation to Jesus?
  • Where do you think Jesus is calling them right now? Do they know it? Are they ready to follow?
  • What makes it easy/hard for them to follow Jesus right now?


[1] Slightly adapted from Margaret Rhody, Associate Director, Office of Evangelization, Archdiocese of Milwaukee. Used with permission.